Monday, May 26, 2008

Definitions of Crossfit

Dear CrossFitters,

Here are a few definitions of CrossFit. Some of these may sound very familiar. HaHaHa!


Word: Accountability Pronunciation: a kaun-ta-bi-le-teFunction: nounMerriam-Webster Definition: a: the quality or state of being accountableb: an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one's actions CrossFit Definition: a: showing up to every coaching session on time and ready to give 110% or your coach will hunt you down by phone, text message, or in person to ensure that your arms & legs are still attached to your body so you can join your group with exercise…b: if you do not show up you will be chastised by doing double of each exercise and will LOVE to do so with a smile on your face!

WORD OF THE DAY Word: Procrastinate Pronunciation: pro•cras•ti•nate Function: verbMerriam-Webster Definition: a: (transitive verb) to put off intentionally and habituallyb:(intransitive verb) to put off intentionally the doing of something that should be done CrossFit Definition: a: to put off your workout until you've finished every last bite of your turtle fudge, chocolate brownie ice cream. After all you burn so many calories with “Really Hard Exercise”….b: to find any little menial chore or task to do hoping it will take so long that you won't feel bad putting off your workout for another day – NOT!

WORD OF THE DAY Word: Cardiovascular Pronunciation: car•dio•vas•cu•lar Function: adjective Merriam-Webster Definition: a: of, relating to, or involving the heart and blood vesselsb: used, designed, or performed to cause a temporary increase in heart rate. CrossFit Definition: a: getting your heart rate to the pinnacle of exercise excellence right before you double over and hurl.b: during a CrossFit workout, commonly confused with La Maz breathing. Clients can be found breathing in rapid succession in a futile attempt to catch their breath. Fortunately we have not had a client give birth.

WORD OF THE DAY Word: Insanity Pronunciation: in•san•nityFunction: noun Merriam-Webster Definition: a: a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder b: such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having any mental capacityCrossFit Definition: a: participating in every ridiculous idea your exercise coach comes up with because they insist, “don’t worry, you’ll like it,” and “you’ll live, it’ll be good for you.” b: When your voice of reason is screaming at you, “be afraid, be very afraid” and you ignore all sensibilities and cave into CrossFit's demands.

WORD OF THE DAY Word: Intense Pronunciation: in•tenseFunction: adjective
Merriam-Webster Definition: a: existing in an extreme degree b: marked by or expressive of great zeal, energy, determination, or concentrationCrossFit Definition: a: the amount of physical pain and mental strain involved in the workout due to lean, mean, extreme exercise!!!b: completing the WOD perfectly with everything you have - dying at the end with your team mates…way to go!

WORD OF THE DAY Word: Projectile Vomiting Pronunciation: - pruh-jek-tahyl vä-me-tingFunction: noun Merriam-Webster Definition: a: vomiting that is sudden and so sufficiently vigorous that the vomitus is forcefully projected to a distance b: The act or an instance of ejecting matter from the stomach through the mouth CrossFit Definition: a: when the workout is so intense and you can no longer compete with the person next to you and you know that the only thing you can beat him/her in now is how far you can vomit!!b: when your first two weeks of coaching sessions turns you white as a ghost and your eyes start to fade away…..all the while your coach is encouraging you eat animal crackers with peanut butter and all you want to do is hug the porcelain throne.

WOD Word: Cancel Pronunciation: can-cel Function: verb Merriam-Webster Definition: a: to destroy the force, effectiveness, or validity of b: to bring to nothingnessCrossfit Definition: a: To call the wonderful people working at CrossFit to tell them that you cannot make it in today because you have to wash your dog and blow it dry for 2-3 hours.OR You are too lazy to get off the couch for an hour to come and play on the CrossFit Playground!! b: To let the cardio equipment look really pretty all clean and tidy while you make a mess with a bag of potato chips!!

CrossFit Thoroughbreds "Xtreme Fitness For Xtreme People"

Jeremy Barnett, ISSA-CFT, Co-Founder

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